I laughed so hard at this I peed my pants a little. Which was very awkward, because I was in the middle of class. Needless to say I got a few strange looks.

As a lover of all things scary and horrifying, a superfan of the supernatural and superstitous, a purveyor of paranormal occurences, and an aficionado of flamboyant and flashy fashion (or at least I’d like to believe I possess all of the aforementioned characteristics), I thought I’d post a chillastic and creeptacular clip. Some people believe in ghosts, some don’t. Like many things, I am on the fence about this one, leaned over and looking into the paranormal side. I even tried my hand at ghost hunting before (but, also like many things, I couldn’t stick with it). This is a montage of supernatural happenings compiled from sources who swear up and down they are “real and unedited.”

Real or hoaxes? You decide. Personally, what’s scary to me is that most of these people can’t spell on their intros. At least it’s not that stupid serene screensaver that suddenly cuts to that screaming face. Here’s a common sense tip: don’t ever trust a situation where someone sits you down in front of a computer to “see something really cool” and then stands nearby to gauge your reaction. Did no one learn from the ”2 Girls 1 Cup” fiasco?

Call me an old-fashioned fart if you want, but I would take tastefully-done classical settings with some pizzazz and character as opposed to the overly rampant body-baring pointless trash videos with painfully robotic dance moves ANYDAY (I’m looking at you, Lady Gaga). Plus, you can’t help but love the Artful Dodger-type kiddo picking the dancers’ and onlookers’ pockets. Anyone who’s ever seen “Oliver” will concur. What better way to fashion a music video than after an old, classic musical?

Ah, my generation, the boombox generation, a simpler time before kids had their newfangled em-pee-three players and cee-dees and decent haircuts. Seriously, what is up with the high-falutin’ boiled goose? And the old people having sex? Fingerless gloves are timeless, though. And doing the Bartman. Not to mention, Julian’s sexy ass. And face. And voice. OK, I have to go watch it again now.

GOOOOOOOOOAAAAALLLLL, vidheads. Well, the world’s most popular international sporting tournament has come to an end, with Spain making every team it played its bitch and fighting its way to the top of the soccer totem pole. Wait, what happened to a South American country being a shoo-in for champion? Oh, well, last time I checked Spain and South America speak pretty much the same language so close enough.
Since I haven’t posted in so long, I decided this post is going to be a twofer. The first clip is Daniel Tosh’s brutally honest, amazingly brash take on foo…sorry soccer, the German half of me nearly took over there for a sec. Whatever. He’s hilarious. Just watch.

For the second clip, I was racking my brain for a classic scene from any one of the epic soccer movies Hollywood has made…but just couldn’t come up with anything above a feel-good 5th grade humor heartwarming flick about a youth team. Don’t get me wrong, I love “The Big Green” and “Ladybugs” is a classic, I just couldn’t come up with a postworthy clip. So, instead, I’m posting a montage of a bunch of idiots streaking across a soccer field. It’s actually pretty funny and, what I think is a good look at one of the best parts of soccer itself. (Namely, the backfield in motion).

OK, World Cup is over, can we start worrying about sports that matter now? Like football and, on a lesser level. baseball (which has its own “world” championship to worry about). I am seriously champing at the bit to get my fantasy football team going. Maybe this year my team won’t suck so much. Don’t fret, Cristiano Ronaldo. There will be plenty of opponents to headbutt in four years. Until then, try not to disgrace Portugal TOO much with your hotheadedness, even if you are just plan hot. Pretty doesn’t excuse bad manners.

Now I don’t care who ya are, that’s funny right there. Pure improvisational genius. It’s a shame the show isn’t on TV anymore, but catching the reruns on late night ABC Family is good enough for me. The reruns never get old.

So, let me lighten the mood by posting a humorous bull video.

Good job, Tony, indeed. You gotta love that this guy couldn’t even hang on 180 degrees into the turn, much less for the full 8 seconds.

Hooray for Mexico. And cerveza.

This weekend’s bout, Saturday March 27, starts at 7 p.m., with doors opening at 6. Advance tickets are one for $10, two for $16. If you’re interested in getting some, hit me up and I’ll hook you up. We need all the support we can get – TARG fans are LOUD.

You gotta love a man who can play his bag. Pipes. And has the bags to wear a skirt. And name his sons Pirate and Zeppelin. Ah, watching this video brings back memories of when I was 19 and living in an apartment on my own, and this old dude in an apartment building across from mine used to come out on his balcony wearing a kilt and playing his bagpipe. Now that I think of it, it probably wasn’t as normal as it seemed at the time.

I’ve been to many a concert, but the only time I got knocked out at one was the first time I saw Slipknot about 10 years ago. I took a crowdsurfer’s combat boot to the head and went DOWN. Thankfully, the show was almost over and I didn’t have to miss too much of the band’s set in the first aid room. Ah, memories (or the lack thereof).